I am officially....

I am officially terrible at Blogging, I have all of these ideas, and never get round to actually writing them down on Blogger and sharing them. I really must try harder. I have read more books in the last six months and not written about half of them. I've experienced new things, new places and again not shared. I'm not really sure why I keep a blog, I think because i find it there when i need it, I don't expect anyone to be reading my musings of the day, it's nice when they do, but I don't think I'm incredibly interesting, so I wouldn't blame anyone else from feeling the same way. So major updates are going to have to happen - I will write up on the summer of sport, I loved every moment. I will write on my watchable rugby now (even though i do watch in welsh sometimes) I will write on my new challenges, both sucess and failures, and I will attempt to keep up with some of the books I read, and if not review them, at least show some comment, because at the end of the day, this is my record, my thoughts, and I think i might want to read them again one day.

Quotes...

I love Quotes... i find them completely facinating. I have them on my wall, and my door. Many are inspirational, many just make me smile, and many tell me that life is okay. I found this one today. I think it sums up a reader quite well. I am going to make more of an effort again to read, because I love it, and thats life:

"You should date a girl who reads.


Date a girl who reads. Date a girl who spends her money on books instead of clothes, who has problems with closet space because she has too many books. Date a girl who has a list of books she wants to read, who has had a library card since she was twelve.
Find a girl who reads. You’ll know that she does because she will always have an unread book in her bag. She’s the one lovingly looking over the shelves in the bookstore, the one who quietly cries out when she has found the book she wants. You see that weird chick sniffing the pages of an old book in a secondhand book shop? That’s the reader. They can never resist smelling the pages, especially when they are yellow and worn.

She’s the girl reading while waiting in that coffee shop down the street. If you take a peek at her mug, the non-dairy creamer is floating on top because she’s kind of engrossed already. Lost in a world of the author’s making. Sit down. She might give you a glare, as most girls who read do not like to be interrupted. Ask her if she likes the book.
Buy her another cup of coffee.

Let her know what you really think of Murakami. See if she got through the first chapter of Fellowship. Understand that if she says she understood James Joyce’s Ulysses she’s just saying that to sound intelligent. Ask her if she loves Alice or she would like to be Alice.
It’s easy to date a girl who reads. Give her books for her birthday, for Christmas, for anniversaries. Give her the gift of words, in poetry and in song. Give her Neruda, Pound, Sexton, Cummings. Let her know that you understand that words are love. Understand that she knows the difference between books and reality but by god, she’s going to try to make her life a little like her favorite book. It will never be your fault if she does.
She has to give it a shot somehow.

Lie to her. If she understands syntax, she will understand your need to lie. Behind words are other things: motivation, value, nuance, dialogue. It will not be the end of the world.

Fail her. Because a girl who reads knows that failure always leads up to the climax. Because girls who read understand that all things must come to end, but that you can always write a sequel. That you can begin again and again and still be the hero. That life is meant to have a villain or two.

Why be frightened of everything that you are not? Girls who read understand that people, like characters, develop. Except in the Twilight series.

If you find a girl who reads, keep her close. When you find her up at 2 AM clutching a book to her chest and weeping, make her a cup of tea and hold her. You may lose her for a couple of hours but she will always come back to you. She’ll talk as if the characters in the book are real, because for a while, they always are.
You will propose on a hot air balloon. Or during a rock concert. Or very casually next time she’s sick. Over Skype.
You will smile so hard you will wonder why your heart hasn’t burst and bled out all over your chest yet. You will write the story of your lives, have kids with strange names and even stranger tastes. She will introduce your children to the Cat in the Hat and Aslan, maybe in the same day. You will walk the winters of your old age together and she will recite Keats under her breath while you shake the snow off your boots.


Date a girl who reads because you deserve it. You deserve a girl who can give you the most colorful life imaginable. If you can only give her monotony, and stale hours and half-baked proposals, then you’re better off alone. If you want the world and the worlds beyond it, date a girl who reads.

Or better yet, date a girl who writes."

— Rosemarie Urquico

It's a cats' life

So this week I am cat sitting, Tilly is my brothers cat, and while my brother, his partner, niece, mum and stepdad are at Disney in Paris. Now I would like to be there, I want to see Mickey Mouse, and go on the rollar coasters, I feel left out. Tilly is alright, but I do not like cats. I don't know how to cope with her, it is going okay. I have had sleepless nights, and my house smells funny, and it looks a mess. I can't wait for a clean. It will take a while with the business of my schedule. But I think I might miss her company when she's gone, but i do think I wont miss the litter box, or the smell, or the lack of sleep.

I can actually ski...

I really can. After thinking that I would never get to see the mountains unless i walked up them, i finally got to ski them. La Plagne is one of the most beautiful places I have ever seen, and not because of the buildings because most of those are unfortunately not the log cabins you imagine when you thin snow and skiing, and are mainly big buildings or flats. However, once in the snow, its stunning, the mountains look out all around you, the snow in many parts is completely untouched, and you can ski though the forests. It is completely beautiful, and best of all I skied it. I had ski school for 3 hours a day, and in that time got to go to 13 panels on the ski map, now that may seem completely daft to some, however, usually i do not move off the nursery slope. I am a complete wuss, i look at a steep slope and think i am going to full directly down it completely out of control. What actually happens, with the right tutor is that I can follow them and not realise that it is steep. I am definitely not a perfect skier, I am still full of fear for others being around me. However, I overcame a big thing, meaning that i parallel a lot more often then snow plough, although that still exists sometimes when i am petrified. But the important lesson is I can overcome everything and sometimes by being brave there are some rewards especially for me to be able to see.

Moving out is...

Moving out has proved to be okay in some respects, but there are still so many things to do. So many things I should have done and haven't yet. So many boxes left to unpack. Right now I feel pretty low, its a bit like limbo. I went 'home' to see my mum, and it didn't feel right anymore. every time I've been back since I left, it has been completely okay. Today just felt wrong. They'd removed things from my room, stacked stuff. It wasn't right. It just felt wrong. I ended up crying on the driveway for quite a while. Coming back to my house, still doesn't feel like home yet. So I feel a bit out of place. I am going through the motions as best I can, but it just doesn't feel right.

I hope this improves. I should be loving it, I do think once i get my routine sorted that it will improve, its just getting the routine in place.

Hopefully it will be there before we go skiing. That's going to be interesting. Having spent 8 weeks living apart from them, being with them for 9 days could be...... hard. We will see.

The New Year...

It's the first of January 2013, and along with the majority of the population. I really feel that I am going to make an impact on my life this year. Last year I achieved so much. This year I am going to do better. Things i did in 2012, that i am so proud of myself for:

• Go Ape - Tree top assult course at Thetford. Alongside my best friend, we completed the 5 levels, of high balance exercises, I had to trust equipment and drop.
• Exercise regime - I did a lot of exercise, and although i am not where i want to be weight wise, i did get into a size 14 pair of trousers, wore the shortest dress I have ever worn - twice. Was able to shop in Oasis all because i love exercise now
• Silverstone - The hardest year I have ever done - and it was really hard this year, with the amount of rain. I could have given up, but i didn't. I asked for help when i needed it, but although it was tough i have done it again.
• Skiing- I can almost parallel ski, and although i am completely a wimp, I am better than i was, and i am definately ready for this next year.
• I bought a house - how can i not be proud of myself. Help might have been required, but i did it, i now am a home owner (with a huge mortgage and lots of bills) but i don't live at home with my parents any more.
• I won both women of the year and Miss Slinky at Slimming World
• I have started to accept myself as me.

Maybe the last one is the most important, there is still a long way to go, but if i can get there that will be amazing. This year is full of incredible memories, the olympics, Go ape, the paralympics, Silverstone, Wales rugby, strictly live at the o2.

This year, I would really like to work on my weight, and my emotional eating. I am going to go to the gym, where I feel happy and in the inside group. I will still go to Slimming World. I am going to try and get a better job, one that makes me feel happy inside, so I enjoy going to work. What that is, i don't know. I know I will get there when I want to though. I can do anything,